Did I eat Angelina Jolie's PBJ? Why yes I did...

I learned early on in my career as a charter pilot that it is not a good idea to eat leftover catering. But as a wise man, Justin Beiber, once said, never say never.


My first brush came after a long day of flying, when we flew through a couple of meal times. If you have a good dispatching department, they have food waiting for you at one of your stops. There may be time to eat it between flights, or during cruise. Since we don't have that category of flight support at my company, us pilots normally fend for ourselves. On this day, we had no time and no food. As we dropped off our last passengers, there was a left over cheese plate. The plastic wrap had been opened, but they hadn't hardly touched it. Being a fan of cheese, I picked out a couple of pieces from the back, and ate them to tide me over until we could get to a restaurant. Somewhere during the drive, I realized my mistake. Since I care little about my appearance when I'm on the road, I pulled over and reversed the mistake. Once the offending queso had left the danger zone, I felt 100% better, lesson learned. And at that moment, I vowed to never eat another's leftovers again.


Not long after, we had a similar food schedule. This time, after dropping our passengers, I was putting the airplane to bed for the day, while the other guy I fly with straightened up the cabin. There was a pizza box in back with one leftover piece in it. He offered it to me. After my cheese experience, I passed. He proceeded to eat it. I looked back at him a few moments later, to see the piece of pizza he was eating had a piece of gum (ABC) stuck to it. I stopped him moments before it was consumed. We both turned slightly green, and never spoke of it again.


Which brings me to Angelina Jolie. Her airplane followed us into San Francisco one evening. I just happened to notice her getting off her airplane as I was getting off mine. She's a very attractive women. Who's not good looking getting off of a private jet, right ladies? She was whisked away by her driver, and I didn't think much of my brush with fame. We walked into the office at about the same time as her crew. They were carrying a tray of PBJ sandwiches. 


"Do you guys want one of Angelina Jolie's sandwiches?" they politely offered.


"Why yes, yes we do." (my kids watch a lot of Phineas and Ferb)


They were very tasty. The kind of peanut butter and jelly and white bread that only the super wealthy and famous could afford. And yet I had no milk...


Thanks for the advise, Beiber.